I'm hurt

I wish I never had to learn the hard way, people will hurt you and feel no pity about it after. I got to say I'm deeply hurt by my decisions and I don't want anybody to fall in the same pit as I. I guess it's rushing things that are not meant to be yours and also crying for something that is not yours either is not an option. where do I go from here? what is next? I guess expecting killed me slowly inside because I always expected things to go my way and not leaving room for disappointment which led to why I feel this way this morning. I wish I could say what hurt me but now I'm afraid and ashamed the way things turned out. Truly ashamed. This Morning I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror, I know sounds really bad, well that's cause it is bad. I wish I could have an amnesia forget all about it but that's just a wish. life goes on they say but it will take me time to forgive myself about this. All in all I don't hate myself I'm just saddened this happened to me.

Its The Life we living

Its amazing  how we want what we don't have and have what we don't want that's always been the case in my life. I don't know maybe I don't appreciate, maybe I deserve better. I don't know quite frankly I don't care rather I'm confused but its the life were living we cant understand everything that revolves around us.

EMPTY VOID

I simply fail to understand people who are selfish i mean umuntu ngumuntu ngabantu. Which world are they living in? in that everything they do revolves around themselves only. It sickens me to go through what I am going through, the minute i finally find happiness and within a split second it's taken away from you. I sobbed for two days then i realised that its not okay to sob for something that is not yours. oh well I'm human after all with emotions, I'm allowed to cry. There's an Empty void, i feel miserable having to go through this time of the festive season is not cool. Its absurd really when you don't even have a anybody to talk to. I really don't know what 2015 has in stores for me because 2014 has been Fun but ended with SAD note.

MY 2015 

• I will definately dream big.
• Put my happiness first
• Play by the rules
• Give back
• Focus on me
• Leave room for disappointment
• achieve my objectives
• Know my weaskness

 Totaly agree with the people who suggest that let 2015 be 20FixIT, it's actually motivation  to fix everything around us and find ourselves, it's really the little things that boost us.

''UMUNTU NGUMUNTU NGABANTU''

HE GIVES AND TAKES

suppose he pops up the question one day. obviosly he'll be expecting a yes. I don't know marriage to me is a joke stating and looking at the increase number of people devorcing. The question still lies, Am I ready? will i ever be ready? What God gives also takes.

I'm not sure if i should be even thinking about it at this age 21

Todays Weather

Its drizzling in Richards Bay, KZN (South africa) I'm at work feeling a bit drained looking outside the window while writting this;
The weather is quite interesting, i like todays weather infact if it could, i would want it to stay like this forever. oh maybe i'm just being a bit silly or bored. I don't know. But theres just something about todays weather. watching drops of the drizzle, drop down the site is like watching me cry, when i think about the problems i have but hey will tell you all about it in time.

Its just so sad that at the age 21 to go through things, oh yes i've figured what is it, about this weather.
it was like this on a particular day when i was surfing through the net aaaand.......fell inlove with  this aaah such a cuteee how i would love to own one.

I am Me

I am Me when i talk, walk, sing and Laugh I tell a story with my action, I can be silly, witty and blonde at times but that doesn't change the fact i'm still me. I don't act perfect cause I am not, I am Just Me. I'm always me, cause i don't want to loose myself and then have to waste time to find myself I'll make stupid decision which is part of life, and that wont make me stupid but they will make me grow to be strong and a better person. I love myself, I care for myself, and i take myself very seriously and that makes me, me. I don't compare myself, theres only one me, and thats me Simple yet sophisticated I am me, and thats all i can be ME.

I've had people try persuade that i change who I am, Like this guy ANELE.. he had said  ''Lihle you are childish, self centered, you think everything revolves around you'' i was shocked, speechless i took it like a woman, i don't know hey if that's true but it's also his Perception about me.

But what really matters is what i think about myself.

i CRY

I CRY


When I laugh, I cry
When I Sing, I cry
When I win I cry

When I pray I cry

I CRY I CRY I CRY

that's what Joy Does to ME

I often wonder

I often wonder

how many of us will actual see heaven
no one is perfect,

By the look of things we all are sinners
we sin hince no one is perfect

I wake up every morning and wonder
will we see heaven?
but we are not perfect bieng

A sin is a Sin theres no saying
" I was joking about it "
yet we live life which is unfair

Life was never fair, can Imagine
if life was to be fair and
how unfair that would be

all in all lets live life despite of all
we fear.

I often wonder.
#LishM